How To Handle Your Teenager Stealing in a Calm, Loving Manner
If your child is caught stealing it is very important that you handle the situation properly so that you don’t completely ruin your relationship with your child. Even though you are angry, you need to make sure that when you confront your child about stealing that you keep calm and talk in a normal tone of voice. Stealing is a crime and is unacceptable. If your child is caught stealing, it is important that you take the time to figure out why your teen decided to steal in the first place. Parents you must also maintain an open relationship with your child so that they feel that they can talk to you openly about situations, such as the scenario described above. The last thing that you want to do is to push your teen further away, which can lead to self destruction and isolation.
Has you child got caught stealing before? How did you handle the situation?
Comments
18 responses to “Help! My Teenager was Caught Stealing. How Should I Handle the Situation?”
Unfortunately, I’ve had to deal with this personally. It’s a tough situation. Especially when you have a child that doesn’t seem to learn from his mistakes. Good post.
I am sorry that you had to deal with this. When I was doing research on this topic, habitual stealing usually has an underlying problem and the stealing is basically a cry for attention. April, I hope that your child will learn from his/her mistakes before it causes greater problems in their life.
I hope to never be in this situation! When I was younger I can remember going to the grocery store with my mom and throwing a pack of gum into the grocery cart. She didn’t notice so when we got home she thought that it had been stolen and made me bring it back to the store and apologize. Even though it was unintentional on my part the lesson stuck with me for years. If it were me I would try to be understanding but firm with my child.
Sara thank you for sharing. My mom did the same thing to us when we accidentally took gum or candy without paying for it.
I agree- find out why they stole in the first place. It’s disappointing but probably not the last mistake they will make.
Leigh
I think if you handle the situation correctly then it will leave a lasting impression on your child.
Your advice is wise, whether stealing or any other issue. Keeping an open line of communication makes all the difference in the world… though in tough situations, that’s hard to do. I know firsthand… my teen went to bed angry tonight. 🙁
Karen I agree communication is important. :0
Wow this would be a tough situation for any parent. This is great advice for all the parents out there. Great post!
Thank you for stopping by Tom. Thank you for sharing.
This post although very serious brought back a moment not too long ago that made me chuckle. My young grandson, age 3 was grocery shopping with me. As most stores do, this one had the gum and candy display handily at the check out low enough for even a crawling infant to reach. I wasn’t paying attention while paying for my purchase until as we exited the store I notice him chewing on something. We stopped, I searched only to find he had taken a candy bar, opened and eaten it. We marched right back inside, I made him tell the clerk and hand him the money. Winking at me, the clerk squatted down and with a straight face proceeded to tell my toddler that it is wrong to steal. We must pay first then we can eat our food. My grandson has never taken another item from the store. Lesson learned.
I remember my mother doing the same thing Carla when me,my brother, or even my own children accidentally took something we were marched back into the store and pay for it.
I have mixed view on this. I was the child that stole and was caught and feared for my life. I told the cop that I was a “dead” kid if my parents found out. So they called them, Dad followed through and I had to deal with the consequences of my actions. Never did it again. Lesson learned. I think that kids need to realize that what they do has an impact. Thank you for sharing this story with us.
Awww I can understand your fear of upsetting your father. However, he followed through and enforced the consequences so that you wouldn’t do it again. Thank you for sharing your experience.
I’ve lived in countries where children stole out of need … hunger being the major one. That’s almost understandable. But what motivates a child to steal when he or she can afford the item? For the thrill? The challenge? The adrenaline high? For attention? So many possible reasons … all of which need to be addressed constructively.
I agree that some children steal out of necessity. Thank you for sharing Sharon.
This is the part of parenting I’m glad to have missed…yikes…
Yes, this isn’t a fun topic to deal with when it comes to dealing with children.