Keeping Dad Involved During Pregnancy – My Experience

Try to involve your husband or significant other throughout your pregnancy so that he feels special and knows how the baby is doing.  I used to share weekly posts about the baby’s growth progress and had him come to my appointments when he was able to go.  If he wasn’t able to go to my doctor’s appointments, I always shared the information that the doctor told me with him.  In fact, I used to send him a text message to let him know what the heart rate was and how far along I was measuring.  I wanted to make sure that I kept him up to date on the babies growth and development so that he felt connected to the baby as well.

I remember having a dream about finding out that my baby was a boy a few days before my 20th week sonogram.  I told my husband about the dream and the day of the sonogram we found out that we were expecting a little boy.  I remember my husband taking a photo of the sonogram machine that revealed the baby’s gender.  We had fun sharing the news with our family and friend’s that we were expecting a baby boy.

Things were going smoothly until I hit 35 weeks and I began having painful Braxton Hicks contractions.  They were fairly strong and were 3 to 5 minutes apart.  Of course, this happened during the middle of the night and we got to make our first hospital trail run only to find out it was  just a false labor run.  This continued until my due date, with all of the Braxton Hicks contractions I never thought I would even make it to my due date.  On the day of my official due date, I went off to the doctor by myself because my husband was unable to attend.  I was devastated when I had an ultrasound and it revealed that my son decided to turn breech.

I knew that the news meant that I was going to have to have a C-Section.  The doctor schedule my c-section and I was off to go get pre-op lab work done before going home.

When I got home my husband comforted me and assured me that everything would be okay.  I am thankful that he remained calm and comforted my fears.  He told me that he would make sure that I was in good hands and that everything was done properly.

We set off for the hospital on delivery day, he remained with me while they prepped me for delivery.  As they wheeled me into the OR, I was in there for alone for a few minutes while they gave me the anesthesia and prepped me for surgery.  It seemed like it took forever before my husband could join me.  As soon as he got into the room, he held my hand and I knew everything was going to be okay.

After the baby was born, he immediately went over to the warmer to see our new baby boy.  I remember looking over at the warmer and watching my husband peer at his new son.  It was love at first site.

Summary:

It is important to involve dad as much as possible during the course of your pregnancy, so that he can feel the special too.  Try these tips to help involve dad as much as possible:

  • Have dad attend appointments.
  • Discuss how you feel and share information about the baby’s development.
  • Take dad shopping for baby gear.
  • Allow dad to help register for baby items.
  • Attend child birth classes together.
  • Let dad feel the baby’s movements.

How did you involve your spouse or significant other during your pregnancy?

Comments

8 responses to “Keeping Dad Involved During Pregnancy – My Experience”

  1. Anna M Avatar

    One of the best things during my pregnancies was having my husband feel the baby moving. He wasn’t one for going to appointments unless it was for an ultrasound and baby shopping was TOTALLY out of the question lol But no matter how much or how little he was involved with the pregnancy, when we had our children (both c-sections) and he was able to walk up to that baby warmer, its like his whole world changed. Probably the best feeling in the world, and the scariest all at once!

    1. Christy Avatar

      I loved feeling the baby move, it is the greatest feeling in the world. I miss it. 🙁

  2. Gina Jacobs Thomas (@totallyfullofit) Avatar

    During my first pregnancy, my husband came to every appointment, and even asked my OB questions. And he was with me almost every step of the way during my c-section. With my 2nd, it was harder for him to make it to every appt, but he did what he could. He would also talk to the babies while I was pregnant, which was really cute.

    1. Christy Avatar

      I think the first baby always tends to get more attention but that doesn’t mean that dad is any less involved or doesn’t love subsequent babies. Thank you for sharing your experience Gina.

  3. Olga Avatar

    Your story is so interesting that I have completely dived into it and forgotten about everything. It is very important and useful as well. Of course, your experience differs from other women, but basics are the same for all of them, and they will benefit.Thank you for sharing, Christy!

    1. Christy Avatar

      Thank you Olga.

  4. Lexie Lane Avatar

    Sounds very much like mine! You’re right, it’s so important to have the husband involved, but I think it’s different for all men… the feelings that is. My husband didn’t really get excited until after the baby was born. He said he didn’t really have all the feelings yet like I did.

    1. Christy Avatar

      Lexie, I am glad that your husband came around after the baby was born. Some men are afraid they are going to hurt their newborn, but they aren’t nearly as fragile as they appear to be.