It is quite a difficult age when they are just teens, both for them and the parents. Not only do hormones start to kick in, together with mood swings, but their personality also changes, and it becomes really hard to stay on track with them. They form their own worlds, stop sharing things with their parents, and it becomes harder and harder to get through to them.
One of the first problems that occurs is related to school and their grades, as with their age, they tend to go down. But not only do they refuse to study, they tend to become extremely passive. Constantly watching TV, sitting in front of the computer playing games, or staring at their Smartphones chatting all day long. However, with just the right tactics, you can easily motivate any one of them to do more work, go out more, and be, generally, more productive.
Give Them Something to Work for
This does not only apply to teenagers, but everyone, as if you give a person something to work for, it is proven that they will work harder. But when it comes to teens, at that age, all they want to is to find their place in the world, their purpose, and to stand out with their achievements. That is why you should always give them a task with purpose, and they will definitely be motivated to do it. For example, a motivation to find a part-time job could be the money that they will spend on whatever they want: Saturday night out, new bike, or a piece of electronic equipment, it does not matter, as long as you make him work for it, it will teach them some responsibility, and most importantly, take them of the couch.
Let them Decide for Themselves
What people at that age hate the most is being shut down by their parents, who constantly tell them, or rather order them, to do different things in their lives. That can only lead them to rebellion, as they hate doing things ‘only because they have to’, especially those that contradict with what they think is right, or with what they want to do instead. So never be one of the “because I said so” parents, but let your young one have a say at everything. Conversation is always the best solution, even when they are acting stubborn, sitting them down and discussing what is a reasonable deadline for a certain chore, what they would prefer to do around a house, or what should their curfew be. Of course, it might lead to a few disagreements, but showing them that you care about what they think, and that you appreciate their feelings, will help you sign a treaty with them much easier.
Let Them Drive
When they reach a certain age, and are allowed to get a driving license, many parents tend to say ‘no’, because they get scared when imagining their irresponsible teens behind the wheel. However, you need to face the fact that you cannot protect them from everything, and that the best thing would be to just let them go to a driving school in Parramatta and get the license, as driving a car will make them feel more powerful and in control, precisely what one teenager needs. All you can do is sit down with them and set the rules when it comes to driving a car, and let them do it. Showing that you trust them enough to let them borrow your car will motivate them to go out, drive, and make you a proud parent for raising a responsible young adult.
Do not Forget to Praise Them
In whatever they do, even if they act all confident and superior, they will steel seek your approval. So every time they do something good, be there to give them words of praise, compliments, and tell them how proud you were, and that is truly the best motivation a teen can get.
Finally, you need to make peace with the fact that sometimes, none of these is going to work, and they are going do what they want anyway. In that case, sadly even though it might be a huge mistake, you cannot do anything to stop them. So do not even try, sometimes just let them be, let them fail, fall on their faces, and let them learn from it. All you can actually do is be there for them after it, not to say “I told you so”, but to support them, tell them everything is going to be fine, and show that that no matter what they do you are always there for them.
Photo Credit: Pixabay
Do you have any additional tips or ways to help motivate your teenager to get something done?
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